Should i obey my boyfriend

Slavery to God is freedom! Sadly, many churches continued to treat one race as inferior to another for many years, and some still do today! Sadly, just like racism, many churches still try to perpetuate ancient Roman laws and treat women as inferiors to their husbands and within churches. I am confident that the Holy Spirit is moving in a beautiful way to finally fulfill the prophecy of Gal , that believers will finally learn to treat each other as equals, regardless of race, gender, social status, wealth, etc.

We must allow the Holy Spirit to unite us, not allow our sinful desire for hierarchy to continue to allow the curse of Gen 3 to be a stumbling block to the Gospel.

We are equals just have separate roles to play. God, for whatever reason chose man to be the head of woman.

It has nothing to do with inferiority or who is a better leader. It has to do with what God wanted. If we truly love God we will trust his wisdom and follow what he word says. He word says that woman was created for man..

God is good and knows how things work the best. Alana, beautifully written. Thank you! Ephesians Submit ye one to another……. I believe a marriage should a partnership or a team for the kingdom of God. The husband is to work just as hard as the woman so the marraige will reflect Christ and the church.

I understand a woman is not to usurp authority over the man and submit. Christ is the head of the church and is faultless. But because the man is human and capable of mistakes they both could seek God together and acknowledge Him in all of their ways and let Him direct their path. God is the head of the marraige. There seems to be some confusion around how the Bible uses the terms submit and obey.

Paul uses submit. And he is very clear that submission between a husband and wife is mutual. The OT uses the term obey. Specifically it uses the term shma. Sometimes translated as obey, shma is also translated as hear. However what shma really means is to hear and take approproriate action.

As in God will shma his people or a wife is commanded to shma her husband. Disrespect for men is taught in every church I have been in — not by direct teaching, but indirectly by showing disrespect for men, implying that is o. The idea that submission to each other cancels the command for women to respect and obey their husbands is open door to disobey any command of scripture. Christians who believe correct doctrine but act on the doctrines of the world are like the man who built his house upon the sand and not the rock, which is Christ.

Eating the flesh of Jesus and drinking his blood is not about eucharist but about eating the Word, living by the Word, the manna, everyday. So obedience to the Word is the same as believing into Jesus. John 6, Deut. Your words are beautiful to the soul. Who are you to tell other people how they should act around their husbands?

Who are you to declare what most people think, as if you have any idea? A strong woman should be able to make her own decisions and share her thoughts just like anyone else. Men are the smarter than women. A marriage is a partnership. A relationship where you make decisions together. Letting someone constantly make decisions on their own is a stupid idea. Being able to compromise and problem solve as a team is going to make everyone happy.

In different cultures, women are forced to be submissive and are mistreated in different countries around the world, which is how you think women in the United states should be traded as Well? Strong, independent women are what we need today. What you wrote was insulting. Your comment seems angry and aggressive. We are simply sharing biblical marriage help. If you gained nothing from the article, just move forward.

Fatima I think you may be misunderstanding what the author Lori is trying to say. She is telling us how God wants us to behave. In this particular case, how God wants wives to behave toward their husbands. Ephesians First tells wives to submit to their husbands as they do to the Lord.

Lord means someone having power, authority, or influence. God is clearly telling you, Fatima assuming that you are married that your husband does have authority over you. God is telling men that they are to imitate Christ and love their wives like Jesus loved the church.

Verse 33 then tells husbands to love their wives as they love themselves, and that the wife must respect her husband. God is clearly explaining that husbands are not to mistreat their wives.

When I say authority I mean the right to make decisions and enforce them. His wife should be one of his best and most trusted counselors. In short, God wants you to help him. Submission to your husband is a choice. Just as submitting to the Lord is a choice. When you choose to marry your husband God is telling you that you must then submit to him because his authority has been granted to him by God. A husband does not derive his own authority. I think that you may be misunderstand what an independent woman is.

It is exactly the opposite of what God is calling you to do if you choose to marry. He is granting your husband authority over you. When you marry you are entering into a covenant with God where you are no longer an individual. Keep in mind that YOU are choosing this. This is her choice to perform on this website.. And obviously I can sense by your style of writing that you are unhappy..

But, the author is right, God is right, you are wrong… These Bublical verses are older then you, and the petty people fighting to push it all away. I am a father of 4, i do not expect my wife to be submissive to me. We work together and I get what your point is. And being older does make you wiser wether you like it or not.. Just remember who is doing the judging on Judgement Day, and those who do not follow, do not get everlasting life with the Father.

Simply look at your husband as your first neighbor. Look at 1 Corinthians 13 and live it. Well that a tall order to fill and we need to show them the same grace we desire.

Dear Lori, I am a husband, and father of three children. The Lord Jesus will reward you for being a faithful servant to His Word. I am in the middle of prayer time and I will pray for you right now that God will strengthen you in this godless culture. May God help all men to truly love their wives as Christ loved the church, and may God help all wives to truly submit to their husbands as the church to Christ.

This is how a marriage works! Thank you for teaching the younger women how to be a good christian wife. I have been married for 10 years and in the last year my husband and I decided to go forward with Gods design for our marriage.

I have allowed him to be the leader. I no longer force my will upon him, but rather lovingly give my opinion and our marriage is stronger and better for it. It is all about breaking the social norm. In few places breaking this social norm is very difficult because of econmoic dependency and emotional dependency.

Moreoever, societial peer pressure. We need to address it in two parts - one individual transformation and two change in the society. To start with women can form groups in their community to work from home and may be in their community and expand it. Teaching and buying in from the rest of the family is impiortant. Because it is not just the husband who sayss wife - "Don't go to work" it is the social norm that makes this tell that, and it is important that we educate women to break that social norm.

We should have enough emotional suppport to back up the women who are ready to take that step. If one women succeeds, it will create the ripple effect in that locality and it will spread and that's it, social norm to that particular area is changed! So true!

Thanks for your contribution Mr Lakshmi Nathan Balasubramanian. Aminka Belvitt 17 November, AM. Empowerment means having power in your own choices and the direction you take for yourself and life. If a woman is making decisions for herself whether it involves monetary compensation isn't necessarily, given different circumstances. As many women can have an income but not necessary income if they are doing a job that they don't like, enjoy or selected for themselves.

As women, we should focus on what makes us women happy and what makes other women happy this is key and the rest is subsidiary. The issues here isn't making money or not making money it is being forced or oblige to do what the man in the relationship says.

There is no equality in one person dominating the relationship and deciding the choices of the other partner. Women face discrimination at the hands of men and gender inequality is a result of patriarchy and imploding such social norms as, "obeying" your husband is rather regressive in nature.

There can be a scenario where a couple makes a unified decision on what is best for their family, with the wife having equal say and respect as the husband does in the decision. The woman who then decides to stay home can be empowered in her choice to do so. She can find traditional ways to contribute funds for her on the side, such as selling baked goods, doing hair, selling fruits and veggies at the market and selling crafts, perhaps, just from her house so she does not have to be from the home.

A woman is not economically empowered by just having money because empowerment comes from self-choice and power, with our individual power over ones' choice how can there be empowerment? Economic empowered is attached to having the financial freedom and ability to make purchases and have access to finances and funds when need by without having approval or power from anyone else. It is wise for a woman to have her own dash for in the worst case scenario.

Perhaps, her partner might lose his jobs or no longer able to make money what will the family do then? A woman can take the money her husband give her and put a little a side for herself or a rainy day. Again, it's about self power and how you use that that determines economic empowerment.

But the ability to financially support yourself and make decisions financially without someone else is the true definition of economic empowerment. On point Sis, thank you so much! Well said Aminka Belvitt! Toyosi Banjo 17 November, AM. I know some men insist that their wives shouldn't work but one thing is certain if she's an active person and stays home all the time she would get frustrated at some point. I know men say this most times so the wife can have ample time to take care of raising their children and taking care of the home.

My opinion is for the wife to pursue her career with her husband supporting her and have a work-life balance. So the children and her husband doesn't suffer because she's pursing and career and she doesn't get frustrated doing nothing. Reply 3 Likes. Abiade, it is sooooo important for women to be able to support themselves financially. I'll surely check it out.

Warm regards. Also feeling that you are contribuiting in this society, build a business or an empire, helping people, realize your dreams gives you Self-fulfillment a feeling that you can only acquire through your own efforts. Look for ways to honor and glorify God in all of your relationships, including your dating relationships.

Speak with kindness. Forgive freely. Run away from sexual sin. These are ways you can showcase Christ without treating your boyfriend like a husband. Leave us a comment, and tell us what you think. She serves on the ministry team of Revive Our Hearts.

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Erin Davis submission 18 Comments Print. Your boyfriend is not your husband. God has a plan to teach you submission. There are controlling men everywhere. You just used this question as a rant on how you hate Muslims. I don't know where you got most of your facts but I have a lot of Muslim friends and they are exactly like regular families.

I suggest you take time to read the quran before you make bigoted judgments. This man is abusive. That doesn't make him Muslim.

They aren't mutually exclusive. I'm sorry I offended you or your friends, but this is how I see it! That guy got all the traits of a typical Muslim! Whether or not he really is one actually doesn't even matter but as I said I'm damn sure he is one! There has never been he existence of an equal relationship. We all have a social hierarchy for things. I am in a 2 month relationship with this guy who is absolutely amazing.

He really does everything for me,he helps me around the house, he fills up my car, he buys my groceries, he cooks when I am too tired etc. He always says to me that I should obey him and be submissive. I should never try to take the lead in our relationship. When we fight I am not allowed to make any suggestions as how to solve the matter.

He says that when it comes to our relationship, he makes the desicions alone. The other thing is that he is always accusing me of cheating. He says that I have to build up his trust before he can stop doing it.

He also tells me what I should wear and what not. I am not allowed to go out with my girlfriends, I have to ask for permission first and if I stay longer than an hour all hell breaks loose.

He says I broke the trust in the relationship. I didn't cheat, I spoke to one of my friends and didn't tell him about it, he later had to find out by checking my cellphone I have to say that I have checked up on him a few times and I am positive that he is not cheating on me.

He never goes out and drinks with his friends which I am greatful for , he tells me when a girls sms's him or talks to him. Since the incident with my friend, I have never kept anything from him or lied to him. He always tells me how lucky I am to have him and that I don't deserve him and that I will never get another guy like him.

He tells me everyday that my blond hair makes me look like a slut and and and Please advise me on what to do? I want to take action! I have started to look out for a place of my own I didn't tell him though and I plan to leave him when I have found a new place.

He really has not been physically abusive toward me but he has said things like he wants to hit me or he can easily kill me because I'm so inferior. Share Facebook. Boyfriend thinks I should be submissive to him. Add Opinion. InquisitiveMale Guru. I just want to point out some stuff for any guys out there reading this and thinking I have a habit of doing this to members.

I completely ignore the question and outline the inner makings of the situation from a guys prospective and how the average guy user should be using the information he's gathering from the question. Hopefully it helps you understand as well in the process. Attraction is not a choice. If you don't spark an attraction with a girl from the start, and she's not feeling those emotions, it's incredibly hard if not impossible to change her mind.

On the other hand, if you meet a girl, and you do spark an attraction, it is out of her control and no matter how much social pressure from family or friends she can't change that. He gives himself value by letting her know that his time is important and he is the one who is "the catch" in the relationship.

And because he really believes it so strongly it makes her believe it as well. That's an example of two belief systems clashing and the stronger one coming out on top.

He leads the relationship. Now I don't agree with how he is going about this at all but most women do want you to lead; women want you to take control of the situation. He's doing it an forceful manor, which is why she is protesting, but ideally you want to do it in a way that still gives her the choice.

A simple example would be going out somewhere; you say "we're going to blah's for dinner". You didn't ask them if they wanted to go, and they could say no, but they don't. Psychologically it sets yourself up in the relationship as the leader and women are attracted to that. They want the alfa. How can you not find this stuff interesting? Because he is able to project these two simple things he has somehow managed to keep a girl in such a restrained and confined relationship.

It goes to show that attraction is not logical. It doesn't conform to the rules of logic. So many people are in the frame of mind that if your nice, accommodating, and affectionate, that she's going to like you. Things don't work that way. This guy has her asking permission to leave the house. He screens her phone and consistently makes accusations toward her. He's verbally abusive and completely dominates the relationship keep in mind domineering and dominate are two different things.

He is the definition of an ass but he still has the girl. Is this still revelant? Show All Show Less. JohnnyBlaze Xper 7. The way I see it, you have two choices: leave or learn to live with it. He's not going to change, so getting him to see the light is just not going to happen. It doesn't matter that he buys gas for the car or groceries for the fridge.

He doesn't treat you like you deserve to be treated. You're right, he is amazing